Monday, October 18, 2010

Did I Do the Right Thing?

This Saturday we went up north to J's mom and step-dad's to celebrate my future mother-in-law's birthday. We had a great time. Lisa made a delicious turkey and we spent the night at our favorite bar, Roy's Place. J's parents have a huge property complete with a barn for their 4 horses, 2 goats and 80 cats. Well, not quite 80, but their original cat General Lee has been quite the little skank. Since bringing her home a year ago General Lee has had 4 litters of kittens. The most recent litter was born just four weeks ago, so when we returned from Roy's we had to go see them.

These kittens were so tiny and so cute. I instantly became attached to the runt (I've always been a sucker for the runts of the litter....I blame Charlotte's Web). He was a teeny tiny little all black kitchen with blue eyes. He was so cold out in the barn so I did the natural thing, and put him in my pocket and snuck him back to the house. Jason and I grabbed him a little chunk of cat food and some milk and gave him what was probably his first meal. His first meal not fighting 10 other cats for it at least. Because he is all black and because we own a coffee shop, we named him Mocha. We spent the next 12 hours with him and fell completely in love. Bailey loved him too. She wasn't quite sure what to do with something so tiny, but she was very gentle.

When it came time to head home, I had a decision to make. I needed to decide whether or not to bring Mocha home. I know J wants a cat and Bailey would love a friend, but I'm allergic. I did fine around him but he's also tiny. What happens when he's full grown? I decided I didn't care, we'd just figure it out and we could always bring him back to the barn. Lisa gave us some cat food and made a tiny little litter box for him and we were on our way. About a mile down the road I started to panic. Did I really want another pet? I know cats are low maintenance but that's more food to buy, more stuff to clean and one more body in our small townhouse to take care of. Plus, what if my allergies didn't go away? I would be miserable, in my own home. So J turned around and we returned Mocha to the barn where he came from.

I feel sick today. I don't know if I made the right choice. I know I don't want another pet, I don't want more responsibility or more expenses. I don't want to chance the allergies. But, I miss that little kitten. I got really attached to him and he was already following me around and cuddling with me. I feel bad that he had a chance to live in a warm home instead of a cold barn. I feel bad that he got a taste of the good life just to be brought back. I know Lisa & Deward take great care of those cats....but he's so small and it's so cold up there. What if he doesn't make it? I'll never forgive myself.

Part of me just wants to drive up there and bring him home and part of me knows I did what I needed to do. I think of his tiny black face and the tiny little purring sound he was already making and I get sick to my stomach. I don't know what to do.

What should I do?

(I have pictures of him but I can't find the cord to my camera. I'll post some later this week.)

11 comments:

Charbelle said...

Oh girl, you know what even with your allergies I've learned that they can go away. She will probably be just fine. Honestly after reading this I really believe you need to go get her and bring her home. She's not going to be that much trouble, she's not going to eat that much food and cats choose you and are extremely self sufficient. She's chosen you already. Bring her home, it will work out just fine.

Marian said...

Awwww, what a tough situation. Like Charbelle mentioned, my sister and brother were both allergic to dogs but we still got a Golden Retriever when we were younger. They eventually got use to it and the allergies didn't affect them anymore. However, since they haven't had dogs in years, whenever they are around my dog, their allergies act up again. I'm not sure if the same thing can happen with cats, but I assume it would be the case. I think you should do what you think is right in your heart. Its not a right or wrong answer. You just have to do what you feel is right.

CMae said...

I am a HUGE animal lover, but I only own one pet and it's going to stay that way no matter how many cute puppies I see. pets are expensive, and although the kitty was a baby, what if it grows up and has health conditions? Another expense like you said. You do have your pup, and giving your dog a loving home is enough (in my opinion) gotta watch out for youself! :)

Jessica said...

Do what your heart tells you. If you know that you wouldn't be able to handle another pet and you feel your allergies couldn't take it, you made the right choice.

BUT... if you can't get the little furball out of your mind, it may mean she's already made a mark on you. She deserves love and attention and it seems she's not getting it being the runt.

Do what you feel is right, either way, you have a very kind soul. Any animal lover can see that. :)

Syndal said...

aww what a tough choice to make! it's obvious you fell in love with this baby and many people with cat allergies do just fine with a cat depending on their hair type and where they grow up. There's a good chance you'll be just fine, especially since you have a puppy. Cats are normally pretty self sufficient so I wouldn't expect it to be an extra inconvenience to take care of her. If anything she's easier than a dog!
But you have to do what your instincts are telling you is right to do. If you don't think she's a match then it will be harder later to bring her back. But if you love her, you love her! I don't think it's a bad idea at all!

chelsea said...

being an animal lover, I feel your pain! I don't have allergies though, so can't be much help. I say try it out? and if not, she will be no worse off than she is now. Hope this helps!

Caroline said...

Thats tough, but if you deeply want her, go get her. But, if you're worried about getting sick and all of the expenses don't. It won't be fair to you or the cat. Do what your head tells you, not your heart!

Miss K said...

So sad! It's such a hard decision.

Stephanie Ann said...

You know you will love her and make a good home for her. I say keep her she will only add love to your life. You can always shave her if you're allergic :)

Carolyn @ life, love & puppy prints said...

Such a tough decision!! Maybe Baisie should have a sister? Ugh. Allergies are hard. I have kitty cat allergies too. No cats for Jake and me... but maybe Mocha needs a mommy and daddy! :)

Sarah said...

ahh tough decision. I'm an animal lover too but having a mother that was allergic to animals and still having an animal I can say that sometimes it just isn't worth it. Feeling sick all the time shouldn't be sacrificed. I love animals but seeing my mom unhealthy and drained because of a pet didn't seem worth it to me.

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