Nolan's Birth Story {part two}

Read: Nolan's Birth Story {part one}

Surprisingly, despite my nerves {and giant belly}, I was able to get a really good night's sleep. When my alarm went off at 6:25am on Friday, April 22nd I felt nervous and excited, really excited. I called Labor & Delivery to be sure they had space for us and they gave us the green light! It was time to head to the hospital and have a baby! 

We arrived at the hospital right at 7:30am and our room was ready and waiting for us. We met our nurse, Sandy, and loved her instantly. After what felt like a million questions were answered, the birth plan was discussed and the hospital gown was put on we were ready to get things going. 

 I got hooked right up to the fetal monitor to track contractions and baby's heart rate and then got an IV of antibiotics as I had tested positive for Group B Strep. Around 8am the doctor {not my doctor but another wonderful one from her office} came in for the first time. We went over my birth hopes and discussed our plan of attack. She checked my progress and I was still 3cm dilated and 80% effaced, same as I had been at my appointment that Tuesday. At 8:15am she broke my water. Outfitted in a giant pad and hooked up to one of those rolling IV thingys, Jason and I hit the halls in hopes of walking our way into labor. We were given two hours to walk and if nothing happened we'd have to start Pitocin {which I really, really was hoping to avoid}. 

While it was nice to be up and moving around, I was leaking so much fluid that walking was pretty uncomfortable. We had to head back to the room every 15 minutes or so so that I could use the restroom and clean up. Really lovely. At one point Jason said "you have used the word 'gush' way too many times today." At 9:15am, Sandy, asked that we return to the room quick so she could check baby's heart rate. This time, she hooked me up to a mobile monitor so we could take it with us while we walked. After heading back out to the halls I started to lose it a bit. I was walking around hooked up to this machine with cords everywhere, the monitor beeping, the IV hanging and I just started feeling overwhelmed and like everything I was wanting to avoid was happening. I told Jason I just wanted to head to the room and at this point we pulled out the secret weapon...FRIENDS. I decided to sit on a birthing ball to see if maybe that would help my progress. 

 At 10:22am, with no contractions happening yet, it was time for the P word. I instantly tensed up, got emotional and felt scared. Sweet nurse Sandy sensed this right away and told me she'd start with the absolute lowest dose, so 6 drops of Pitocin it was. Shortly after the Pit was started, my mom arrived. We spent the next 45 minutes or so just hanging out, watching Friends and waiting for something to happen. 

 I did start to have some minor contractions but they weren't really painful or even really worth noting. I was happy to feel things happening but it still didn't feel like the real thing. At 11:01am {I love Jason's detailed notes}, Sandy came back and I had to hop back into bed. When I was on the birthing ball, baby's position changed into a spot where they weren't able to get a good heart rate read. Sandy fixed the monitor, looked everything over and then suggested we up the Pit again as the contractions were still weak and irregular. We once again we did 6 drops.

That seemed to do the trick because shortly after the contractions started to come fast and furious. Jason joked that of course it was 12 drops that worked because 12 is my favorite number. I had Jason start to track the contractions and was thrilled to find they were coming every 3-4 minutes, but weren't all that painful yet. It didn't take long for them to get stronger and soon I was asking that everyone be quiet during them, was standing, leaning over the little table tray, swaying my hips and chanting "owwwie, owwie, owwwwwie" which is the exact same thing I did with Kenley. Jason, my mom and nurse Sandy were all so encouraging with their words and made me feel like I was handling the contractions like a champ - it was such a positive and even fun atmosphere.

At 12:04pm, it was time for another check. This time I was 5cm dilated and 90% effaced. I was so excited that I was making progress. At this point we also talked about pain management. I told Sandy that I wasn't against getting an epidural and likely wanted one but didn't want it until I got myself to 7cm {one of my birth hopes}.

The contractions started getting much stronger and were right on top of each other. I felt them more in my back but the back labor was nothing compared to what I had with Kenley {she was sunnyside up} and I could feel a good amount of pressure as baby got lower. Once they got really strong I asked that we turn Friends off and I think that's when everyone knew we were really in business. Pitocin contractions are notorious for being stronger and more painful but honestly, the contractions I was having late in the game were the same in strength as my contractions were before even getting to the hospital with Kenley. I don't know if it's because my body had done it before, because I was in much better shape or what but I handled them so much better than the first time.

At 1:05pm Sandy checked me again and excitedly announced I was 8cm!!!! I cannot tell you the pride I felt! I had exceeded my goal! I gave going without an epidural some real thought, but the pressure I was feeling was freaking me out and when I thought about feeling everything as I was pushing I decided that I was just not interested in experiencing that. So with an excited tone in my voice I told Sandy "epidural me!"

The awesome anesthesiologist arrived about 15 minutes later. He was so cool and did his best to work around my contractions. He was also so positive and cheered me on as I worked through the contractions that were coming so fast. At 1:26pm, the epidural was in on the first try and I felt very little pain as it was inserted. Again, such a better experience than with Kenley. My left foot started to tingle instantly and within minutes I felt sweet relief from the contractions. I could still feel some pressure which I appreciated as I knew it would come in handy when it was time to push. The only negative side effects were that my legs each felt about 200 pounds and my boobs itched like crazy. Epidurals are so weird.

At this point, it hit me how unbelievably hungry I was. That "light but protein packed" breakfast I was suggested to have just was not cutting it and I had used every ounce of energy I had getting through those contractions. I drank an apple juice and ate a popsicle in hopes the sugar would give me a boost, but I was just spent. I also started to get more and more nauseas. My mom noticed the color had left my face and suggested a ginger ale. It tasted absolutely disgusting, but I choked it down anyways. After some time, the color returned to my face and I felt better, starving, but better. 

Around 2:30pm Sandy gave me another check and I was thrilled to learn I was fully dilated with only a small "lip" of my cervix remaining. Because baby was still working on getting lower, we decided to let the contractions push him down versus starting to push too early. Because I wasn't feeling so hot, I was more than fine with just hanging out, resting and taking some time to regroup before having to push. The only downside to that was that our sweet Sandy was off duty at 3pm. I really thought I might cry when she left us. Our new nurse, Kayla, was also awesome so even though we missed Sandy, we knew I was in good hands. 

At 4pm, we all agreed I was ready to push, but of course it was also time for a shift change between doctors. The doctor who had been with me all morning said the next doctor would be arriving shortly, he was down the street at one of the malls. We all found this hysterical and were joking about what he could possibly be shopping for to keep him from the hospital. It was decided he must be picking up something on behalf of Jason from Tiffany's {no such luck on that one}. 

At 4:41pm the new doctor {who was actually the one I saw when I was trying to get cleared to fly to Colorado and was awesome} arrived and it was time to push! My legs were absolute tree trunks so in order to push I had to hold on under my thighs while Jason and Kayla each had a foot. As I was pushing I was seeing stars, everyone was cheering for me to push harder and I was telling myself if you push any harder you're going to pass out. In between pushes I felt so nauseous my face was either in a barf bag or an oxygen mask. As baby got low enough, the doctor noticed the cord was around his neck. I was instantly terrified but he assured me that baby was low enough that he could get him out quickly if needed. It turned out the cord was so long it was a non-issue, thank God! 

With the doctor and Kayla cheering me on and my husband saying all the most perfect and motivating things, I pushed with all my might and at 5:28pm felt my son make his entrance into the world and heard his raspy little cry for the first time. I looked down and saw his face and have never felt more proud or relieved. He was here! My Nolan was finally here! 

I got to hold him on my belly for several minutes while the cord finished pulsing. Because it had been wrapped around his neck, the nurse took him to give him a good once over. Thankfully, he was absolutely perfect! Nolan weighed exactly 8 pounds and measured in at 20 inches long, though we think he was probably a bit longer than that {based on his measurements at his 2 weeks appointment}.

We spent the first hour of Nolan's life, just the three of us. We were completely mesmerized by him and couldn't believe how much he looked like his big sister. We did skin to skin and let Nolan give nursing a try, he latched right away and even though he didn't eat for long, caught on right away. 

For as nervous as I was to be induced, the experience couldn't have gone much better. I am amazed by what my body has done and feel a real sense of pride when I think about delivering both of my perfect babies. 

Nolan's Birth Story {part one}

I've been dragging my feet writing Nolan's birth story because I just didn't know where to start or how to put that day into words. As I finally sit here sipping my Iced Chai with my little guy asleep right next to me, I am feeling kind of blue that it is all over. When you are pregnant all you want is for that baby to get here and now that he is here I feel as though it all went too fast. Knowing this is my last baby has definitely heightened my sensitivity to everything and I'm sad about how quickly time is passing by. But nonetheless, grab a cup of coffee or a glass of wine {or both!} and get ready for one heck of a post. I don't want to forget a single detail about the day my son was born, so this is going to be lengthy.

..................................

The weeks leading up to Nolan's birth day were unlike anything I could have anticipated. As I'm sure most women who are 37+ weeks pregnant, I was feeling tired, achy, huge, uncomfortable, anxious but also excited and so ready to meet my baby. We had our hospital bags packed, the nursery was finished and all that was left to do was wonder when our little guy would decide to show up.

When my grandma unexpectedly passed away on April 12th {I was 37w4d}, I fell apart. I couldn't believe the timing of it all. I bounced between every emotion you could think of but more than anything was devastated beyond belief that I wasn't able to fly to Colorado to mourn with my family and be at my grandmother's funeral. Of course, the health of my baby was priority number one but it was hard. Really hard. It was also hard to be filled with so much sadness and grief during a time that was supposed to be filled with an excited anticipation. Needless to say, it was a very hazy week.

At my 38 week appointment on April 15th {the day before my grandma's funeral} my doctor suggested inducing me at 39 weeks because of Ziggy's potential size. He had been consistently measuring big in all of the ultrasounds from 12 weeks on and knowing my super strong desire to avoid a c-section my doctor thought this was the best option.  Being induced early went against all of my Birth Hopes and everything I wanted for the birth of my son but after having a really good in depth and honest conversation with my doctor who I love and trust so much I decided we would go ahead with the induction. I should also note that in the entire 38 weeks of my pregnancy that was the first appointment I went to alone {by choice} and I sobbed uncontrollably when my doctor walked in the room and said "How are you doing?" Again, I adore my doctor and that appointment ended up being more like a mini therapy session.

As good as I felt about the decision, the timing was difficult. My mom was still in Denver with my grandpa and was supposed to be heading back to Arizona before driving home for the summer. Thankfully, she was able to get a flight home and my awesome stepdad made the trek from AZ to MN without her. Also crappy timing, my dad and stepmom were leaving town for the basketball tournament we run every year in Denver, so if baby didn't come before 39 weeks, they would be gone for his birth. I was super emotional about my dad being gone but at the end of the day, I had to do what was best for me and Ziggy. Everyone kept telling me to "just take care of that baby" so that is exactly what I did.

That following Tuesday, April 19th {38w3d}, I went back to see my doctor and have my membranes stripped. The hope was that this would get labor started in a more natural way and save me from having to be induced. I went straight from the doctor's office to the gym and took another walk that night {in the rain} desperate to get things moving.

Over the next two days my Braxton Hicks got stronger and a couple even felt like the real deal but were never consistent or "real" enough to track or time. I thought we were for sure in business when I lost my mucus plug in the Holiday gas station bathroom after walking around the lake with my mom and Kenley...but no such luck.

And just like that it was Thursday, April 21st the day before I was to be induced and no real signs of labor were apparent. This is when the doubt and fear set in. Is this what I really wanted? Is this truly what is best for the baby? What if... What if... What if...

I cried and I prayed and I talked to my very patient husband who reminded me of my great conversation with my doctor. He reminded me of all the reasons why we made this choice and reminded me that tomorrow was the day I was finally going to meet my son. I thought about my grandma watching over me and I felt her giving me strength...this was it...our baby was coming TOMORROW one way or another.

As instructed, I called to schedule our induction. I left a message for the nurse and after waiting over an hour for a return phone call I called again....don't make an anxious pregnant woman wait for the phone to ring! That's just cruel. This time she answered, found my paperwork and then informed me that they didn't have any openings for Friday but I could come in on Saturday or Sunday if I'd like. She said it so nonchalantly as if I were scheduling a hair appointment or something. Turns out, my doctor had written down the wrong hospital because I had seen her at a different office than usual on that Tuesday. Thankfully the nurse confirmed the hospital and we caught the mistake but of course, she'd have to check with my hospital and then call me back. It ended up all working out and we were set at the correct hospital for the following morning. I was to call and check in at 6:30am to be sure there was a room available but other than that, we were good to go.

Kenley was at school that morning but after I picked her up and we both napped we spent the rest of the afternoon together, uninterrupted. We made a Play-Doh garden, had a tea party and packed her suitcase. Once Jason was home from work we had a nice family dinner and then took Kenley out for ice cream. Naturally, I was super emotional about my final hours with Kenley as my only. She, on the other hand, was PUMPED!

We brought Kenley to my mom's for a sleepover that night. We had to be at the hospital so early that it was better for all of us to drop her the night before, but spending the night without my sweet daughter was, of course, emotional...are you sensing a theme here?

last photo as a family of 3

The nurse I had talked to suggested I eat a light but protein filled breakfast before heading to the hospital. Knowing myself and knowing I'd be nervous I knew I would not have an appetite, so Jason and I swung by Target to get some protein powder so I could choke down a shake in the morning.

We got home around 8pm and decided to walk the neighborhood in one last ditch effort to get the ball rolling. However, deep down I knew that being induced was how this story was going to play out. Our neighborhood walk lead us to a restaurant near our house where we split an awesomely huge plate of nachos. As nervous as I was, it was so fun having a little date night with my hubby before we had our second baby. It really was a perfect night just the two of us.

Check back tomorrow for the rest of the birth story. 

What to Pack for the Hospital

With ONE MONTH {from today!!!} until my due date, it was time to get our bags together. Kenley was born a week past her due date but who knows what this one will do, so it's good to be prepared. There are a few things things that will need to be thrown in last minute as we use them every day but having our bags mostly done and knowing it won't be a last second scramble to collect our things while I'm huffing and puffing through contractions is a relief. Being that this is the second time I am doing this, I feel like I learned from the first time and was able to eliminate and consolidate what I am packing. Here's what I feel are the essentials for giving birth at the hospital. 

Last time, I brought entirely too much stuff for myself. I think I had like 3 pairs of underwear packed of which I wore one pair on the way home {those mesh underwear things they give you are actually great when you're just sitting in a hospital bed with a 20 pound pad on}. This time around, I am bringing basically no clothes, I figure I will wear TO the hospital what I plan to come home in as I'll be changing into a gown as soon as I get there and will just hang in a comfy nightie and robe once we're in recovery {I got this one so that I feel somewhat cute}. If I end up with a C-section I may need some extra stuff but I figure I can cross that bridge then - we live less than 10 minutes from the hospital so having Jason run home for things or asking someone to grab stuff for us would be easy. So really, I'm just packing the absolute basics and essentials for myself.

 For Mom:

□ Toothbrush

□ Toothpaste

□ Lotion

□ Deodorant

□ Shampoo

□ Conditioner

□ Concealer

□ Makeup Basics {foundation, powder, mascara}

□ Chapstick

□ Nipple Cream

□ Brush

□ Hair ties

□ Nightie

□ Robe

□ Nursing bra (x2)

□ Underwear (x1)

□ No slip socks
□ Towel {no thanks on those paper thin, teeny towels}

□ Pillow

□ Essential Oils & Diffuser {lavender & clary sage}

Jason is pretty low maintenance in terms of stuff, so for him it's really just the bare essentials like a couple of toiletries and a change of clothes. If we end up in the hospital longer than anticipated, he can run home for more clothes.

For Dad:

□ Toothbrush

□ Mouthwash

□ Deodorant

□ Chapstick

□ Gum

□ Boxers (x2)

□ Socks (x2)

□ Change of clothes

□ Shorts for sleeping

□ Pillow

Anything that you NEED for baby is provided by the hospital - hat, blankie, diapers, wipes, etc. Of course, if you WANT to have your own outfits & blankies bring those {like I am} but other than that, I am just relying on what the hospital gives us. I'll have the diaper bag with us to bring home everything the hospital sends us with and will also bring my nursing pillow but other than that baby's bag is going to be pretty empty. Oh, and obviously you need to have your car seat ready to rock.

For Baby:

□ Diaper bag

□ Extra Blanket

□ Extra hat

□ Jammies

□ Going home outfit

□ Nursing Pillow

□ Car seat

As far as those extras go, I think it's really to each their own. Whatever you can't possibly spend a day or two without, should come with you. With Kenley, we had friends and family bringing us food all day long so all the snacks we packed went un-opened. This time we'll bring some granola bars and a couple of Gatorades just in case but other than that the hospital has food/drinks or we'll ask our parents to help feed us. Dad - you're on milkshake duty again! Other than that we'll just bring our camera, laptop and phone chargers along with some of my FRIENDS dvds for entertainment. And really, that's it.

Other:

□ DSLR

□ Granola Bars

□ Laptop & Charger

□ Phone Chargers
□ Extension Cord {never know where those outlets will be located}
□ FRIENDS dvds

And one last tip, I made a list of all the last minute things we need to throw in the bag before we head out the door and left it on the top of my bag {makeup, phone chargers, wallet, etc} because you just never know what of situation you will find yourself in, so in case it's a more rushed/panicked one having the list will make grabbing that stuff super quick and efficient and will prevent you from forgetting anything.

Anything major you mamas think I'm missing?

The Birth Hope

Oh hey friends!

I've been MIA the past few days thanks to a fever that attacked my baby girl late on Sunday night. Poor little thing just has not been herself and I can just see her tiny body working so hard to fight off whatever this is. Thankfully, yesterday afternoon the fever seemed to break and we appear to be on the tail end of whatever this is. Last night while my darling husband cared for our peanut, I was able to sneak away with my mama to visit the hospital where I'll deliver Ziggy for a tour of the birth center. Yes, I am delivering at the same place where I had Kenley, and while you'd think I'd be all "been there, done that" going to the hospital always has and always will be a cause for anxiety for me. Going to back and getting a refresher was something I felt would be really good for me and would help calm my nerves about embarking on this crazy journey for the second time.

Touring the hospital again ended up being a great decision. I was really surprised by how much has changed in the past 3.5 years. Not only have the rooms received a facelift but our hospital has taken some great strides towards being more mama friendly. Don't get me wrong, we had a great experience with Kenley but I definitely didn't feel confident in voicing my needs and wants for my birth. During the tour they mentioned bringing a birth plan several times, they mentioned immediate skin-to-skin and delayed cord clamping, as well as adding hydrotherapy pools to 5 of the labor rooms {not for a water birth but for laboring}! All of these things were music to my ears and made me feel so much better about having an idea of what I want for this birth and feeling more comfortable about making those wants known without feeling high maintenance or judged.

Before I get in to what those wants are, I feel I need a little disclaimer...I am sharing this personal part of my pregnancy with all of you in hopes that it will help others, even if just one woman {or man} learns something or feels this is helpful then it's worth sharing. I do not post this to start arguments or debates or to get people worked up about their particular birth beliefs and even though it seems that unsolicited advice and opinions are an unavoidable part of pregnancy {annoying}, I just want to say that you can agree or disagree with my plans/ideas and that's
OK but if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. Us mamas need support and encouragement and nothing else. Except maybe brownies. Lots of brownies.

So anyways...

When it comes to childbirth you can plan and plan until you are blue in the face and with the help of a baby daddy/birth partner/doula/midwife/doctor a lot of women are able to execute that plan pretty well. However, no matter the plan there are always elements of childbirth that just cannot be pre-planned. It is for this reason I have changed the name of my Birth Plan to my Birth Hope. I'm no dummy, I've been through this before and I know that there are some things that are absolutely in my control and some things that are just not.

I will start by saying that I am a big advocate for natural childbirth. Sounds silly coming from someone who had an epidural the first time, right? I'm not against pain interventions and I'm not against C-sections. I'm not against doctors or hospitals or any of those other things that some passionately feel strongly against. I believe a mom's health and a baby's health are absolutely the priority and whatever needs to be done to get a baby safely into the world is cool with me. I just also believe that every woman is capable of having a natural birth {it's what our bodies were made to do} and whether or not she does is a matter of choice {and some circumstance}. I was not able to do it naturally. I wanted to. It was the plan. But when it came down to it, it just hurt too bad and I was not mentally strong enough or prepared enough to get myself through it. And I'm 100% ok with that. I don't regret it, I don't have sad or disappointed feelings about my birth...I got my baby here and we were both healthy and safe and that at the end of the day was my only goal.

Beyond the ultimate goal of a healthy mom and baby, I do have hopes for my next birth. Hopes that have come from what I know and learned from my first birth as well as the books I've read, movies I've watched and birth stories I've heard. So with that, here are my Birth Hopes for Round 2.

1. Avoid a c-section at all costs. Like I mentioned, this isn't because I think they are bad or have any kind of judgement on people who have had them, it is simply because it scares the living crap out of me. Although routine, a c-section is a major surgery and being cut open and then recovering with a newborn and a 3 year old is just not something I want to do unless I have to. If there comes a situation in which it is ABSOLUTELY medically necessary for me to have surgery for the health and well being of my baby, of course I will do it. Of course I will. But, I will only cross that bridge if that time comes. Until then, my plan and my hope is to be educated on any other options I may have. 

2. Labor at home for as long as possible. If you haven't picked up on this yet, I hate hospitals. Up until a few years ago, I couldn't walk into one without throwing up. I hate knowing there are people in pain and people dying within those walls. It physically hurts me, makes me anxious and is what causes the vomiting. Silly, I know, but it's just one of my many quirks. If I didn't love my doctor and her practice so much and want the security of the hospital's equipment if necessary, I would be all about a birth center. I mentioned awhile back that I read Ina May's Guide to Childbirth and there was a part that stood out to me, "...I learned by observation and experience that the presence of even one person who is not exquisitely attuned to the mother's feelings can stop some women's labors..." This was so true for me with Kenley. The second I walked into the hospital everything hurt way worse and seemed way worse and I wasn't progressing at all. That anxiety I feel at the hospital mixed with people who didn't understand how I felt or what I wanted absolutely affected my progress. For this reason, I want to be at home where I am comfortable for as long as humanly possible. The hospital is only 5 minutes away and I don't want to go until my contractions are on top of each other and I'm screaming bloody murder. 

3. Remain mobile for as long as possible. With Kenley, being tied down to the bed with the fetal monitor was just about the worst thing I'd experienced. I had terrible back labor and laying on my back felt as though I was being tortured. I want to allow gravity to do it's thing, I want to be able to do what I need to do to handle contractions the best I can and I know for me that is not being attached to a bed. I am excited to have the option of a hydrotherapy pool. With both pregnancies being in the water has been so calming for me, whether it's the bath, a swimming pool or even just in the shower something about water relaxes me so much.

4. Try my stinkin' hardest to put off the epidural for as long as possible. With Kenley, I got the epidural at 5cm dilated after 13 hours of labor. With 5cm to go and the typical slowing that occurs with an epidural, I needed pitocin which lead to Kenley's heart rate dropping {as it very often does} and I found myself right on the verge of a C-section. This time I have a goal in my head that I want to make it to at least 7cm before asking for the juice. I realize I run the risk of it being too late, and truthfully I'm OK with that. If I am forced to have a natural birth, well, then I have it. Plus, waiting on the epidural will help me with hope #2 since as soon as I get the epidural, I'll be on my back in bed.

5. NO episiotomy! I had an episiotomy with Kenley and it lead to a really painful recovery. I had to sit on a donut for days and wasn't right down below for months. I also recently learned that Jason saw my doctor cut me and it's left a permanent scar on his brain {sorry babe}. I know that tearing is likely and probably inevitable but this time I'd like for it to just happen naturally. I feel like if it happens how my body needs it to it will heal as it's supposed to. I'm sure it's no fun either way, but I feel pretty strongly about this one this time.

6. Immediate skin-to-skin. I was passionate about this with Kenley and in the whirlwind of having just given birth didn't advocate for myself. They did her measurements and gave her the vitamin k and eye drops before I got to hold her and while it was just fine and we clearly had no problems bonding, I just didn't love it. I want to hold my baby the second he comes out, I've waited long enough to see him and hold him! I was so happy to hear that my hospital now has that as standard procedure. They give mama a chance to do skin-to-skin and nurse along with delayed cord clamping before taking measurements! Yay! 

It's truly crazy to think about going through all of this again. I was so anxious and nervous with Kenley because I didn't know what to expect. This time. I'm actually kind of excited! It's of course unnerving and a little stressful not knowing what will happen or how it will happen or when it will happen and no amount of birth experience can change that, but, I cannot wait to meet my baby and am looking forward to getting the ball rolling! I know it will hurt and be hard and I'm sure I'll grow more and more nervous as the big draws near but I feel more prepared now and feel that my support system and delivery team are on my side with my wishes.

Preparing for Childbirth

If you've been following this blog for a while, you know that I am a major proponent for women understanding their bodies, their health, their healthcare options and advocating for what is best for them and their family. You also probably know that pregnancy and childbirth fascinate me and I quite literally can't learn enough about it. Yes, I have gone through the labor and delivery process before {you can read Kenley's birth story HERE} but I know that every experience and every baby is different, so my passion for learning about the options and the process is just as strong as it was 3.5 years ago. No matter what kind of birth experience you desire, it's important to be educated! A quote from one of the recent books I read really stuck out to me:

"Birthing is so integral with life—so common—that choices surrounding it often get relegated to chance. We tend to go along with what everyone else is doing, assuming that must be for the best. Living in a technological society, we tend to think that the best of everything is the most expensive kind available. This is generally true, whether we are talking about cell phones, cameras, cars, or computers. When it comes to birth, it ain’t necessarily so."  —Ina May Gaskin

This quote is exactly why, I personally, think educating yourself on the process of labor and delivery and the different risks involved with different interventions {or lack thereof} is so very important. Going with the flow is a fantastic quality but when it comes to your health and the health of your baby understanding the process and possibilities and standing up for what is best for you is crucial. You wouldn't buy a house or a car without doing your research so why would you have a baby without doing the same? 

When preparing to give birth, whether it's your first time or your fifth, I have a few things that I would recommend to all my friends {like you guys!} no matter what kind of birth experience they hope to have.

Ina May's Guide to Childbirth
I have been wanting to read this book since I was pregnant with Kenley but just never quite got around to it. It's a classic in the realm of natural childbirth so I was curious what all the fuss was about. Overall, I really liked the book. The first section is birth stories, and normally I'd be all over that. I love me a good birth story. BUT, these particular stories seemed more like an ad for The Farm {the community Ina created with a team of midwives for women to give birth at}, so I was a little offput. I ended up skipping over most of that section and getting to the good stuff. Whether you want a natural birth or are sure that you do not, I would recommend this book. It is very biased towards natural birth, but I figured that would obviously be the case. Even though I know I will give birth in a hospital and will likely request an epidural {again} it is still empowering and incredible to read information on how our bodies were made for this and how our emotions affect the process. You can't give yourself a heart transplant without medical intervention but you absolutely CAN {even if you don't want to} give birth without it. For me at least, it really motivated me to trust myself and my body to get my baby here and even though I will have help from doctors and nurses, I don't need {or want} to utilize everything that they have to offer.

Birth Plans for Dummies

I know, I know. It sounds so ridiculous right? But this book was actually really educational and super helpful. Even if you aren't planning on writing a birth plan, this is a good one to check out. It was kind of like reading a childbirth education class. It was a quick read as it was to the point and got right to the information. This really doesn't have any kind of bias towards natural birth or not, it simply delivers the facts and the options that women should be aware of before birth. If you are planning on putting together some kind of birth plan, absolutely read this book. It was a huge help to me {details on my birth plan for Ziggy coming up at some point soon}.

The Business of Being Born

I love this movie. Again, incredibly biased toward natural childbirth, but so so so educational. It's really eye opening and something all women should see before giving birth {in my opinion}. I wrote a longer review on the movie when I was pregnant with Kenley, you can read that HERE if you'd like.

Childbirth Education Classes

These classes seem to be a sort of a right of passage for first time expectant parents and while a lot of people roll their eyes at them I think they are so helpful. Sure, everyone learns differently, but I found the classes we took so extremely helpful and beneficial. It's so important for the daddy-to-be {or whoever your birth partner may be} to understand the process as well so they know what to expect and how to help you. I knew Jason wasn't about to read books on childbirth, so for us this was the perfect way for us to learn together. We decided we didn't need or want to take a class this time around, though, I know a lot of places offer a condensed refresher course for second time parents.

Birth Stories

Every woman's experience is so very different no matter what her plans or intentions are which is why I LOVE reading/hearing birth stories. I think reading the experiences of other women {or asking friends/family to share theirs} is an awesome way to learn about all the different things that can happen throughout the process. I am lucky to have had quite a few amazing women share their birth stories right here on mama and mou and believe me when I say I go back and read them often...especially now! 

So there you have it. My personal opinion on preparing to bring a baby into this world!
If you have any books, movies, blogs, etc that you recommend on the topic PLEASE pass it on...I can't get enough!

Lucy's Birth Story {04.27.15}

Good morning lovelies! I'm excited to have the wonderful Ruthie Hart here today guest posting and sharing her sweet little daughter Lucy's birth story! Ruthie was sweet enough to share her first born, Ford's, birth story a while back and am honored she has returned! It's crazy to me how different two birth stories can be for one mama! So sit back, enjoy, and grab some tissues {anyone else cry every time they read a birth story?}

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 I am Ruthie Hart, stay at home mama to 2 under 2 (Ford and Lucy), wife to Jon, blogger, crafter, and lover of all things mommy related. I had two very different birth stories and am excited to share my daughter Lucy Joy's with you! You can read my son Ford's birth story here: Ford's Birth Story.

 Phew. It is almost surreal that I am sitting down to write the birth story of my second child, my daughter, Lucy Joy. It's still hard for me to believe that I am a mother, let alone a mother of 2! My second pregnancy has come and gone and the Hart family is now a family of 4. I know I've written many times that second pregnancies are so much different than your first. My belly grew and I knew I was pregnant but all of the sudden it is the night before my C section and it hit me, this is real! I didn't spend as much time prepping emotionally because Ford kept me quite busy but what a blessing it was to spend 9 months growing Lucy inside of me. I assumed that I wouldn't have a lot to share about her birth since it was a scheduled C section but what would a birth story be without a little bit of drama? I will probably over share and go into a lot of detail but that is for my own sake. Her birth was crazy, beautiful, emotional, and something I never want to forget so I want to write down everything (writing this 4 days after her birth).

We spent the weekend before her birth like we would any other weekend. A few chores, big Saturday morning breakfast, a birthday party, church, naps. We wanted the weekend to be as normal as possible and it was perfect. I felt so calm and relaxed and happy! Sunday April 26th my sister and Embry drove in from Dallas for the birth and stayed with us that night so my parents, brother, and his girlfriend came over for dinner and just to hang out. Ford and Embry are getting along so well these days and it is a lot of fun to watch them play. Babies are such good entertainment! Jon and I put Ford to bed together and it was the first time all weekend that I got emotional. We prayed over our big boy and plopped him into his crib, knowing the next time we saw him we would have Lucy. At 9pm Jon and I said goodnight to my sister and got in bed. Our favorite show is Food Factory on FYI so we put on an episode and shut out the lights. 2 hours later I still hadn't fallen asleep and I looked at my phone. Jon was still awake too and neither of us could fall asleep. I don't think I was nervous, just excited and couldn't shut my brain off. We had a 4am wake up call in order to get to the hospital by 5am and I don't think we got more than 1-2 hours that night. Adrenaline got us right out of bed and we were both really excited and energetic! Jon showered and I packed last minute things and we were off. No one was on the road and we jammed out to Bruno Mars and Meghan Trainor (reminding us of Ford because his favorite song is All About That Bass).

The next 2 hours were kind of slow... we checked into L&D and went straight to triage where I changed into the paper gown, got my IV, answered questions, and was hooked up to the fetal monitor. The week prior, my blood platelets were at 117 (normal is 130-over 400) but my doctor told me that we were golden with anything over 100. I wasn't worried one bit because what were the chances of such a drastic drop which is why I was absolutely shocked and devastated when the nurse came in at 7am, just 30 minutes before my surgery, and said they were 93. My happy and relaxed demeanor immediately changed and I started bawling. The nurse told me that they like to run a tight ship in surgery and we'd walk to the OR right at 7:30am so it was very overwhelming not knowing if I would be awake or asleep in just a half hour. I assumed the anesthesiologist would come in and give me the prognosis but it made things a lot harder when he told us it was up to us to make the decision since my numbers weren't too far below 100. He gave us the risks and benefits of choosing a spinal (being awake) and general (asleep, what I had to be with Ford). All I really wanted was someone to tell me "This is what we are doing!" and not leave the decision up to me. We didn't have time to fervently pray about it and receive an answer (although we prayed a lot in those few minutes) and I still hadn't seen my doctor yet. The risks were low but still risks. I would hate to be the one responsible for my own life long neural damage or paralysis just because I wanted to be awake but I was devastated the thought of being put under. Jon wouldn't be with me and the recovery is a lot harder. Like I said, the nurses were adamant about walking right at 7:30am so when I finally saw my doctor at 7:20am, I was relieved. I am really close with her and knew she would guide me in the right direction and the second she saw me (I was crying pretty hard at this moment), she said "We are doing it Ruthie, you are going to be awake!". I wiped away my tears, kissed my parents, and 10 minutes later we were walking to the OR! One other thing I want to add (just so I don't forget) is that my blood sugar happened to be really low that morning so I was given an extra IV bag to boost it. Funny how I had gestational diabetes and normally my sugars were too high, yet on the day of my C section they were low. What are the odds.

It is the weirdest thing to walk back to the OR minutes before you are in surgery. Husbands aren't allowed in the OR while you receive your spinal so I was lucky that the team of nurses and doctors were so nice and kept me calm and collected while we were separated. The OR was so bright and white and sterile, very different from the romantic seeming OR on Grey's Anatomy and I immediately started shivering. I was set up on the table while I got my spinal and honestly it was not bad at all! I had been worried all along that it would be super painful but it was nothing more than a  bee sting. I was laid down and covered with heated blankets while they continued to prep the room. I know it was probably no more than 10 minutes but I kept asking when Jon was going to come in, afraid that they would forget and he would miss it! I also kept the nurses and anesthesiologist in the loop about every minute, announcing that I could still feel my toe, etc. It was such a weird sensation to lose all feeling below your chest. They did lots of trial runs, pinching me in different areas to make sure the drugs were working. Jon was called back and I remember having the biggest smile on my face! My doctor and her partner (who was my doctor with Ford and I love too!) came in and the party started. I felt at ease and so relaxed, right when they started I said "So everyone what should we talk about?". I kept my mind off of what was happening below the drapes and was shocked by how little pressure I felt. I guess I expected the worst and was pleasantly surprised by how little pressure I felt. It was light tugging here and there but I didn't let my mind go there. Within minutes they said "Okay she is almost out!" and my heart was racing. Lucy girl ended up having a rather large head (like her brother) so they ran into a speed bump when they couldn't get her out of my little incision and had to press down HARD on my chest. I felt a lot of this pressure and just took deep breaths. Jon looked during this time and said it was so surreal. I cried when he said "She has so much hair!" and knew I was about to meet my daughter. I felt them pull her out of me and could hear her little gurgles. They held her over the drapes and I saw Lucy for the first time and it was in that moment that God expanded my heart and I instantly felt so much love for her. It was THAT moment I had been worried about my whole pregnancy. How could I ever love her as much as I loved Ford? And now I knew. I got a good look at her for about a minute and then they took her over to the warming bed to clean her up and weigh her. I was so overcome with emotions and couldn't stop crying tears of joy. She was a few feet away from me and I watched the whole thing. Jon was right by her and took tons of pictures. They announced her weight, 7lbs 6oz, and that she was 20.25in long with a head the size of a 10lb baby (14.5cm). Our beautiful baby girl was wrapped up and brought over to my head and we got our first pictures with her. She looked exactly like her big brother!

In addition to my C section I had to get a post umbilical hernia repaired that I got from my 1st pregnancy so we agreed that Jon would take Lucy back to the nursery to get cleaned up while I finished my surgery. My parents got to watch Jon and Lucy in the nursery and took lots of pictures for me. I kind of liked being alone while they sewed me up because my eyes were closed and I was able to rest and pray. I laugh because the whole time I felt SO good and even thought, I can probably walk right out of the OR! What a different experience than Ford's birth! Lucy Joy was born at 8:21am and by 9am I was wheeled into recovery. By this time I started to feel very sleepy and super nauseous. I was glad to have time on my own to rest and unfortunately threw up a few times. A side effect of some of the meds is itching and I felt like my body was covered in bugs, yuck. About a half hour later Jon wheeled our beautiful daughter back to me and I was able to nurse her right away. It is so crazy how quickly breastfeeding came back to me. My entire hospital stay with Ford I had to have at least 2 people help me get started and this time she latched right on. Since only 1 adult could be back there with me at a time, my parents and Jon took turns being with me before we were released to our postpartum room. The rest of the day was just wonderful. I dozed off, nursed my daughter, and got really excited to introduce her to her big brother! I still can't believe I was able to be awake while she was born, that moment I saw her for the first time is just indescribable. For the sake of this post going on and on and on, I am going to share photos and details of the rest of our stay (and most importantly big brother meeting Lucy!) in another post.

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If you would like to share your birth story, please email me at mamaandmou@gmail.com

Natalie's Birth Day {08.27.14}

Today I am so excited that my real life friend, Katie, is here to share her daughter Natalie's birth story. Katie and I are friends from high school and today is Natalie's FIRST BIRTHDAY - could there be a more perfect day to share the day this sweet little girl was born?

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Hey everyone!  My name is Katie, and I (gasp!) don’t actually have a blog.  BUT, I do love reading blogs and have been reading Mama & Mou ever since getting pregnant with my baby girl.  Ok, I read it before that too- but I’ve also known Kristin since middle school.  I was so excited to get the chance to share my daughter’s birth story because I actually have never written it, but I have been meaning to do it for the last 12 months now, I guess its better late than never!

My sweet little girl, Natalie Alice, was due to enter this world on August 20^th, but at each doctor’s appointment from 37 weeks on, I was told that I would have her early.  I saw three different doctors in that time and each of them said “no way’ was I making it to the next appointment!  However, the due day came and went…and the doctor finally let me schedule an induction if I hit 41 weeks, joking that it was just a formality, because I definitely wouldn’t be needing an induction!  Well, guess what?  Turns out I did it.  It was just about the weirdest thing going to bed the night before I was induced, knowing what the next day would bring and also having NO clue what it would be like.  For some reason, I was incredibly worried about what the right thing to eat for breakfast would be.  I debated this for way too long, and finally settled on oatmeal and peanut butter for the win!  My husband, Mark, and I got to the hospital at about 7am and got settled into our labor and delivery room.  The nurse started an IV and hooked up some bags of fluid.  The overnight doctor was still there, so she came in and broke my water at about 8:30.  It didn’t hurt at all, which was great because I was expecting the worst!  She said to me “Well, there’s no leaving without your baby now!”  Don’t worry lady, wasn’t planning on it!

The nurse then started to give me Pitocin through the IV and it wasn’t too long before I started to have some contractions.  I decided that we should walk around while the pain was still manageable, so we strolled up and down the hallway.  After about an hour I decided to try sitting on the yoga ball. The contractions started to really heat up at this point but I had barely made any progress.   After more walking and more bouncing on the ball, the contractions were getting to be really painful, so I was sure I had to be moving a long in the process.  I remember being blown away by how each contraction was really a "full body experience" rather than a terrible cramp.  I was still only at about 3cm by 1pm, so the nurse suggested getting an epidural so she could turn the Pitocin up to the maximum dose.  I had planned on getting an epidural all along, so it was an easy decision to make when the time came.  The anesthesiologist was apparently having a busy day, but he was in our room and getting the epidural going by 2:45.  Side note, he was a super attractive young doctor and the hospital should probably ban him from the premises because it is not cool to have to a super attractive young doctor see your pregnant backside.   I have a medical device implanted in my lower back and there was some concern about whether it would interfere with the epidural.  Unfortunately, something about it did interfere and the epidural only worked on one side of my body.  The anesthesiologist suggested that I lay on my side to help the medication “spread out evenly,” which did help, but I was never completely numb.   I tried to relax and get some rest, as I knew I wouldn't be getting much that night, but  I really couldn't settled down at all.  I was laying on my side for the next 2 hours while the Pitocin was at the maximum dosage, but then I started to be able to feel everything again and had the nurse come back to check things out.  I was sure she would tell me that we still had a long time to go, in fact, I had just texted my family and friends and told them we were in for a long night!  

Instead she told me that I was ready to push!  Umm, excuse me? Say what? I was wanting more meds before this happened!  I am grateful that the epidural lasted long enough to get me to a 10, but I was definitely not thrilled that the main event would be au natural.  Who really has time to care about this though when a baby is about to exit your body? My doctor was still across the street where her practice is, but they paged her to come over and got me started with some “practice” pushing.  A second nurse came in, the doctor got there, and they set Mark up holding one of my legs, even though I could easily move them on my own. 

I was completely blown away at how hard it was to hold my breath while pushing and counting.  To be honest, I had a few moments of “no, sorry, I cannot do this.”  I was almost instantly fatigued from the pushing, which was pretty surprising to me since I worked out up until 41 weeks and was actually in excellent shape.  It just felt to me that the baby was completely stuck and that I was making zero progress despite using 110% of my strength. After 45 minutes, the doctor told me that the baby’s heart rate was dropping and she was not getting enough oxygen.  She said she would give me one more good push while she used the vacuum, but that she would be performing an emergency c-section if the baby didn’t come out.  Something in me just said no way would I stop pushing and I just knew that I had to get her out on the next push.  I have no idea how I made that happen, but one more push (and completely disregarding the counting nurse next to me) and Natalie was here!!  As soon as everyone saw here, they all said..and I quote “Oh! THAT’S why this was so hard!”  Turns out she was sunny-side up AND had her umbilical cord wrapped around her, literally pulling her back in after each push.  She came into this world frantically swinging her arms and kicking her legs, like she was finally free!  One of the nurses said she had never seen a baby move that wildly so soon after birth.  I thought maybe I should be worried about it, like maybe those couple of diet cokes I drank in the last 10 months actually were full of the caffeinated poison I read about on the Internet.  But then I had a warm little baby on my chest and her eyes were wide open and she had this tiny perfect cry.  She didn’t let out that loud cry you think about, she was really very mature about the whole thing. The nurses helped me to breastfeed her for the first time and she latched on perfectly, causing my very first words to her to be “Oh! You’re so smart!” And she still is, she’s the smartest little baby.  She entered this world at 5:28 pm on August 27^th, 2014.  She was 7 lbs 3 oz and 20 inches long.

I was able to get out of bed right after having her since the epidural was long gone.  It was nice to let Mark hold her while I got cleaned up and ready to move into the room where we spent the next 2 nights.  I can’t even describe that first night having a brand new baby sleeping next to you.  If you’ve been through it then you already know what type of magic it is, but it is pretty surreal and well…magical.  The days in the hospital are now a total blur, but I know there were lots of visitors, lots of poking and prodding, a little bit on jaundice, and a few terrifying moments in the shower.  We survived it though!  Mark and I really had no idea what we were doing and probably still don’t, but she is now the happiest and sweetest (and smartest!) 1 year old. 

So there you have it, nothing too wild or crazy, but with the most perfect ending!  Thanks for reading!

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Happy FIRST Birthday Natalie! And thanks for sharing your story Katie!

If you are interested in sharing your birth story, email me at mamaandmou@gmail.com